Tag Archives: anger

Frey Freyday – Anger

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(Frey Freyday is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

A man is about as big as the things that make him angry. – Winston Churchill

For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Speak when you are angry – and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret. Laurence J. Peter

Anybody can become angry – that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way – that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy. Aristotle

You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger. Buddha

People won’t have time for you if you are always angry or complaining. Stephen Hawking

Too much self-centered attitude, you see, brings, you see, isolation. Result: loneliness, fear, anger. The extreme self-centered attitude is the source of suffering. Dalai Lama

To be angry is to revenge the faults of others on ourselves. Alexander Pope

WORD TO LIVE BY:

Anger- a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. Something we should let go of, release, avoid.

When I was young, starting my life in the workforce, I thought anger helped propel me in my workday. I look back and wonder how many days I spent being angry and letting that motivate me.

I also had a more sarcastic humor, often based on anger. It did make people laugh but in retrospect, I think it may have distanced some people and it built a perception of me that wasn’t true, or I hope it isn’t.

When we all get depressed, we find power in anger sometimes. It is a continuous loop or circle, we feel sad/depressed and powerless, the anger comes from frustration, etc. and the powerful feeling of anger makes us feel better, feel in control momentarily, but it is fleeting and then we get depressed again.

I remember I had some really cheap luggage with these painful, thin handles years ago. Anger is like heavy baggage with painful handles that we carry around. The bags are meant to be for someone else but we’re the ones stuck carrying them around, weighing us down.

I read once about the Sedona Method. It was a different way to look at things. No judgement. It was an easy way to let go of anger (and other emotional methods). Just ask yourself, “If I wanted, could I let go of this? When? What if I let go of this now?” Imagine holding a pencil and then just letting it go, letting it drop. We can do that with anger. (See the bonus below)

Every day we have plenty of opportunities to get angry, stressed or offended. But what we’re doing when get angry is giving something outside us control over our happiness. We can choose to not let little things upset us.

Parting thought: Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. Unknown
Frey Freyday was actually born out of something I created called “Words To Live By” (WTLB). Going forward, I will now not only share the quotes, as you may be used to receiving, but also a related (WTLB). In 1999, when we had our first daughter, I was contemplating how I would raise my new beautiful child, and I was thinking about how I can best educate her and my other children about values, morals, and other key thoughts about life. School offers education. Religion offers some values and morals. Parents offer most of it, sometimes intentionally, sometimes accidentally.

So I created a (WTLB) book, like a dictionary, which lists things like honesty, love, persistence, etc. with a definition that I created, with my wife’s input. I then turned it into a workbook with one word per page and space below for notes. For years we would discuss with my two daughters and they would draw pictures and make notes in the blank space. I may share some of those images with you. As they got older, they were less inclined to draw and more open to quotes and references from adults, hence where Frey Freyday came from….

You can read more at www.onewebstrategy.com

BONUS  :

More on the Sedona Method: https://www.sedona.com/How-It-Works.asp

Now, hold it in front of you and really grip it tightly. Pretend this is one of your limiting feelings and that your hand represents your gut or your consciousness. If you held the object long enough, this would start to feel uncomfortable yet familiar.

Now, open your hand and roll the object around in it. Notice that you are the one holding on to it; it is not attached to your hand. The same is true with your feelings, too. Your feelings are as attached to you as this object is attached to your hand.

We hold on to our feelings and forget that we are holding on to them. It’s even in our language. When we feel angry or sad, we don’t usually say, “I feel angry,” or, “I feel sad.” We say, “I am angry,” or, “I am sad.” Without realizing it, we are misidentifying that we are the feeling. Often, we believe a feeling is holding on to us. This is not true… we are always in control and just don’t know it.

Now, let the object go.

What happened? You let go of the object, and it dropped to the floor. Was that hard? Of course not. That’s what we mean when we say “let go.”

Is it Useful?

“Adjust your habitual vocabulary—the words you consistently use to describe your emotions and sensations—immediately change how you think, feel and live.”

Did you ever notice someone who has some believe from long ago that seems to hold them back?

I know of someone that was once not afraid to fly, then one small thing seemed to happen once on a flight 15 years ago, and now this person is very afraid to fly. She holds onto the belief that she is scared to fly and it is part of her story. Is it useful to have that belief?

Maybe even one event happened in there lives and from that point on, they just hold this belief?
Sometimes we have a judgement, fear, perception, or whatever.

Or, do you ever see someone getting upset, angry, or emotional and it is hurting their judgement or how they are handling a certain situation?

Worrying is another thing that some people do – some people even believe that they ‘need’ to or ‘should’ worry.

Many of our mothers worry about things. There are people that stay awake at night worrying. Is this useful?

(Of course I know that none of the above items ever apply to you or I)

Here is a question to ask in any of the above situations:

IS IT USEFUL?

  • Is that belief, that story from the past, that judgement, fear, perception…..
  • Is it useful to get angry in all occasions or upset at all times?
  • Is worrying useful?
  • Maybe there are times when the above make sense, but asking the question ‘is it useful?” may make us more aware of those times when we have a belief that limits us.

Sometimes we have to be aware of our thoughts, beliefs and actions and be willing to let go of things that are not useful so that we can grow and move on.

 

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