Tag Archives: acceptance

Words to live by: Celebration

This was the most-visited post that I’ve ever had on my blog– I posted it over a year ago. Let’s celebrate!

(This is one of a part of a series of WORDS TO LIVE BY. This series grew out of a workbook I first made for my young daughters and discussed at the dinner table. These Words include values, good ideas, and Words to aspire to….and learn from….enjoy!)

I know right away some people may question why or what I mean by celebration and why it is a Word To Live By.

I think we all need to celebrate more often.

Yes, I said we. As I’ve mentioned before, I am naturally a low-key guy. I think part of me tries to downplay things. I notice that especially with friends, with my sisters, and relatives – those with which I grew up – when something good happens or when I’m excited about something – I try to act cool, calm, and un-excited when I tell them about it.

The other day I was excited about a project at work. I was telling a relative and I noticed that right way, I downplayed the whole thing. It came off like I was actually down about it. He tried to give me some encouragement. I was actually excited. I needed and wanted to celebrate with him. We both would have enjoyed it and benefited, right?

In any case, celebrating is something I believe to be a key issue in life, here’s why:

  • We need to celebrate things each day, even the little things – we paid the bills, we have good health, we took some kind of action and had some kind of success, we did something good for someone else, etc.
  • So many times we actually did something good, accomplished something, took action and we don’t take a moment to celebrate.
  • Celebrating in the present moment allows us and helps us to focus on the now, what is going on – whether it be with our family, friends, work, or fun things.
  • We can benefit greatly from celebrating future events – here’s what I mean – if you act as if what you want in life is already a reality, celebrating “IT” as already being reality brings in all kinds of good emotions, eliminates thoughts of conditions, limitations. Your brain doesn’t know that the difference between the imagination and reality of it all – so Celebration for something as if it has already happened is very powerful.

Imagine that you already have “it” or that you’ve already accomplished “it” – then celebrate! Wayne Dyer says “Highly realized people learn to think from the end- that is, they experience what they wish to intend before it shows up in the material form.” Celebrate that car, that job, that improved relationship, that newly thinner, leaner body. Enjoy it.

I practice money coming in and I get the feeling like I’m winning the lottery. I hold my arms up like Rocky on the top of the Philly steps and I jump around. I visualize and celebrate. I enjoy it.

How would you react if you won the lottery? Got a perfect job? Had that perfect car/house/relationship/health? OK, now go ahead and practice celebrating it so that when it arrives, you’ll be ready. In the meantime, you’ll feel great.

I’ll be honest, I don’t know if it will always work, but EVERYTIME I feel really great afterwards! I’m smiling, happier, energized, and guess what? I’m now looking for good things to come, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Celebrate what you’ve accomplished in your life! Too many of us don’t give ourselves enough credit. Look into the past, briefly, get those good references and celebrate them. You endured hurdles and mistakes and you are now the person you are because you kept moving. Celebrate it!

Celebrate the present – your family, friends, work, life, health – even if it isn’t perfect. Sure you can want to improve something but hell, if you didn’t have your situation now, you wouldn’t have the perspective, wisdom, and knowledge to make it better, right? Guess what, you can help yourself now, you can even help others, you have choices, that’s great, celebrate! Celebrate your health and life – would you prefer the alternative?

I know that there are some days when you don’t feel like celebrating. Use Tony Robbins’ method “What could I celebrate today? (then even if you can’t think of something ask:) If I could think of something to celebrate, what would it be?”

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” — Oprah Winfrey

Celebrate the future as if it is already happened! Celebrate the person you want to be, the thing you want to have, the issue you want to resolve, the situation that you want to improve! Enjoy it! Feel the fun!

Celebrate what you want to see more of. – Tom Peters (author of In Search of Excellence and other books)

Feeling happy/celebratory/abundant/whatever surpasses the money in your bank account, the report from the doctor, the whatever – and transcends what others may think of you. Genuinely feeling a certain way is possible when you detach yourself from the things you desire and then celebrating it.

Dream on it. Let your mind take you to places you would like to go, and then think about it and plan it and celebrate the possibilities. And don’t listen to anyone who doesn’t know how to dream.
Liza Minnelli

Don’t you think that you’re more attractive to others when you’re thinking celebrating rather than the “ho-hum” you? Wouldn’t your career be a little different if you approached it in a ‘celebrating-way’ rather that complaining, whining and doing the minimum as so many people do? (not you of course)

Celebrating sends a message to others around you, even to the Universe (if you believe in such)

“Don’t forget to CELEBRATE!!! Anchor the experience of doing something truly extraordinary with an awesome celebration.”- Tony Robbins

Celebrating brings smiles and laughter. It brings joy and happiness. Enough said.

Beliefs

UPW Tip of the Day: What is the force that determines what we try or fail to try to accomplish in our lives? It is our beliefs—about what we’re capable of, about what’s possible or impossible, about who we are. In Haitian culture, a person’s belief in the deadly power of the witch doctor “pointing the bone” can indeed cause death. But the real killer is a sense of certainty—the belief—not the witch doctor.http://bit.ly/upw-ny – Tony Robbins

What do you believe?

We all have beliefs, ideas, judgements, and expectations…

  • Beliefs about others,
  • Beliefs about the world, about luck, about their careers.
  • Beliefs about ourselves
  • Beliefs about fears and limitations.

What beliefs do you have about your fears and phobias? Do they serve you well? Do they empower you? Many of us have fears from our childhood or false/needless fears that hold us back, that limit us, and that just don’t really help us. Maybe it is time to reevaluate those fears?

What beliefs do you have about yourself – your talents, your goals, your successes and your failures? Do they serve you well?

Did you ever notice that our believe appear to be true, that they appear to be reality?
Becareful what you believe.

Once in a while I believe that we all need to step back and look at our own beliefs and evaluate them.

Do they help us? Do they empower us?
You can change your beliefs. You can change the meaning behind events and things around you.

\Your truth is the truth, so make it work for you, make it serve you and your world better.

Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives. -Tony Robbins 

Simple Stuff – action, work, opportunity

(Simple Stuff is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

I hope the millions of people I’ve touched have the optimism and desire to share their goals and hard work and persevere with a positive attitude. – Michael Jordan

I don’t pity any man who does hard work worth doing. I admire him. I pity the creature who does not work, at whichever end of the social scale he may regard himself as being. –Theodore Roosevelt

Talent in cheaper than table salt. What separates the talented individual from the successful one is a lot of hard work. – Stephen King 

Usually, the best way to find the yellow brick road of your life, is to start out on the dusty, dirt one.
And then let yourself become so preoccupied in making the best of it, having fun, and challenging yourself that you actually stop paying attention to the path.
Until, one day, not so long from now, with a new best friend, wearing cool clothes, feeling awesome, a teeny tiny bit taller, fresh from a WOW vacation, looking for the path you just left, you’ll notice that it’s 24 carats… baby.
And you’ll wonder for a long, long time, sipping on some exotic fruit drink, when the transformation actually took place… – Michael Dooley – The Universe

 

Young people are threatened… by the evil use of advertising techniques that stimulate the natural inclination to avoid hard work by promising the immediate satisfaction of every desire. –Pope John Paul II

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.  –Thomas A. Edison

 

Do you want to know who you are? Don’t ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you. – Thomas Jefferson

Action is the foundational key to all success.- Pablo Picasso

Feeling stressed, tense, worried?

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You know, we’ve all been there in one way or another: we’ve been tense and focused on money, maybe stressed, maybe short with our spouse, maybe short with our kids….and in that moment when we’re stressing about money, we’re missing the world around us.

You know what I mean when I say “That awful feeling in the pit of your stomach because you feel like you have to worry about running out of money at the end of the month.”

I’ve been there, then back on “top”, then stressed again, a few times in my life.

I heard a funny thing the other day; someone was saying how they thought ‘rich people’ always think about money and ‘rich people’ are all shallow.

Maybe some are shallow, but in my experience and from what I read, when you had enough money to pay the bills and to live in a decent way, you’re NOT thinking about money much at all. When you have enough to cover the bills, you can think about fun things, about things that you WANT to do in your job and career, and things that you can do for or contribute to others – you can choose to enjoy life a little more.

When I was struggling with income and bills, and when I observe others that have the same struggle to pay bills and meet their obligations, they think about money all day long.

There is a great book that I highly recommend called “Bridges out of Poverty”. It helps explain how people struggling in poverty are constantly thinking about how they are paying the bills, food on the table, tires on the car, utility bills, etc.

Even if we aren’t at the poverty level, we can sometimes have some traits of the poverty mindset……we worry about money, about paying the mortgage, about our jobs, etc. This never creates a good feeling inside, does it?

Again, as someone that has been back and forth, here is some wisdom that I’ve learned from a few others and I believe that it really can help:

  • Focus on what you want, not what you don’t want – instead of focusing on the bills and lack of cash, focus on the things that you really want, the freedom, peace of mind, better health, better relationships, enjoying life, security for your family, etc.

  • Watch your self-talk- we all talk to ourselves and ask ourselves questions throughout the day. There is enough negativity in the world, don’t add to it by bringing yourself down. I was someone who beat myself up for many things and once in a while still do – if you do also, STOP. Reflect on accomplishments, look for references why you’re good at something, ask yourself questions like “Why do I deserve this?” and “Why am I so lucky?” instead of things like “Why can’t I earn more money” or ‘why is this such a struggle’ or ‘why don’t I ever win anything?”

  • Have a vision – ok maybe your life isn’t where you want it to be now and you want to improve – almost everyone does….create a vision. It doesn’t have to be a major complicated thing – something as simple as some bullet points or a paragraph or two is fine – create a simple story of you as you want to be – make the story in present tense as if you already have it – as if you are already “THERE” and you’re looking back on today, when you are struggling. Make sure that in the story you talk about how you’re proud of the steps you took, the hard work, the good attitude, and how you changed for the better. Remember, tell the ideal story of your life as if it is already done!

  • Enjoy the present, live in the moment – when we worry about the future or fret over the past, we miss moments and experiences right in front of us. I recall a time when my wife and I had time alone and I sat there worrrying about something that never even happened. Another time I recall worrying about something and basically ignoring my daughters when I had a free day with them. We all lost and nothing was gained. Take a moment to look around, be aware, and live today’s life. Things can happen in a moment. Look for miracles. You gotta celebrate life’s moments no matter what. There is no rehearsal.

  • Here’s something that can be the toughest for any of us – do the above each and everyday. We can all do things for a while or on occasion, or here and there. We have to ask the right questions, focus on the good stuff, reflect on our vision, and enjoy the present every day! We all must take action – even if they are just baby steps each day. Ask, ‘what thing, regardless how big or small, can I do today?” You don’t have to spend long on it – but at least 5 -10 minutes. Can you turn off the TV, put down the phone, or walk away from the computer or ipad for 10 minutes if it makes you better?

Remember, people with much less smarts, ability, education, opportunity have done great things, contributed, made money, helped others, and been successful , you have the ability, you have the power inside, you just need to take action.

http://www.onewebstrategy.com

😉

This is a very good blog….

This is a very good blog from author Noah St. John www.noahstjohn.com

Your life is a reflection of your thoughts – what I call the thought-seeds you plant and give energy to.

More precisely, your life is a reflection of the unconscious assumptions you make about life and your relationship to it.

For example, if you grew up in an environment where there wasn’t much money, you would probably assume that making money is hard, and that’s just the way it is.

And because you made this assumptionunconsciously, you probably wouldn’t even realize that you’re holding on to it in the first place.

If you could find a mechanism that could record the thought-seeds you’re planting on the inside and play them back to you on the outside, it might sound something like this…

  • Why am I so broke?
  • Why don’t I have enough money?
  • How come I’m not more successful?
  • How come I can never get ahead?
  • Why do other people have so much more money than I do?

Well, a mechanism does exist that records and reflects your subconscious thought-seeds.

That mechanism is called your life!

So here you are, unknowingly asking yourself these negative questions, which lead to disempowering assumptions, which lead to you not believing you can reach your goals.

What do you think the answers would be to the negative questions in the example I just gave you?

The answers would be things showing up in your life that reflect the disempowering questions you’ve been unconsciously asking.

For example, if you’ve been unknowingly asking, Why am I so unhappy?…

The answers will show up as you being unhappy, no matter how many good things happen to you.

If you’ve been unconsciously asking, Why don’t I have enough money?…

The answers will show up as your lack of money, no matter how hard or how long you work.

And if you’ve been unwittingly asking, Why can’t I lose weight?…

The answer will show up as your not being able to lose weight, no matter how many diet and exercise programs you try.

I call these dassumptions—a portmanteau of disempowering and assumptions.

When you carry around these dassumptions,your life becomes a reflection of them.

That’s why all of the goal-setting in the world won’t work when this is the case—because you simply don’t believe that you can reach your goals in the first place.

Take Action Challenge:

Stop assuming you can’t. Start assuming you can.

The meaning you assign…..

We all have times or days when something happens and ‘boom’ we’re in a funk, in a bad mood, or in some way we feel like we lost ground, got hurt, was betrayed, etc. etc. etc…..right?

Maybe your sister got asked to go to your favorite concert and you didn’t …. on your birthday!

Maybe you didn’t get that job offer….

Maybe you have someone in your life sending you negativity – maybe even hate — your way.

All that can, and often does, make us feel bad. (Do you ever think about that saying “Feel Bad”?)

We feel bad because we assign certain meaning to it. In many ways we CHOOSE to let an event mean something to us, then we feel a certain way, according to how we’ve grown up, been conditiioned to do so.

Here’s an example:

A relative of mine had a big problem with another relative of mine and me. So, to “Show Us” that relative moved away, didn’t talk or communicate with us for 20 years. We tried to reach out to her a few times but eventually we went about our lives and enjoyed life. We didn’t know any better.

Recently I found out that this person who went away, did so to “punish us” and make us feel bad about something she thought we did (we didn’t). So for 20 years, she was sending us negative waves, so to speak, and intended for us to ‘feel bad’. However she didn’t communicate well enough, because we didn’t know that.

So for 20 years, we felt good, we didn’t know that she wanted us to feel bad. Had we known otherwise, we probably would have felt pretty bad, right?

But look at our daily lives and those few examples I gave at the start. We assign “bad feelings” to all or most of those. If we get rejected, we automatically tell our selves that is “Bad” and we should feel that way.

But what if we interpret it differently. What if we hold judgement until later? Did you ever have something happen that seemed ‘bad’ but turned out to be a great thing? Me too.

What if you said, “Whoa, I didn’t think that would happen, but let’s see how it plays out…”

For instance, you really want a job. Your friend thinks you’d be great for the job. You get a connection and you get a referral into an interview. All looks great. Then you get rejected. You’d probably feel “Bad”.

But what if, in time, that company was found out to be tied to another company doing unethical and illegal things. What if that company you wanted to work for shut down totally, all people lost their jobs and you would have lost your job?
That happened to me. I interviewed and interviewed for a cool job. I wanted it bad. I got rejected. I made myself feel so bad that I had to take off work from my real job for a day to recover. Then that  company closed it’s doors after it was linked to several accounting and ethics scandals. Everyone lost their job. I was glad that I wasn’t apart of it.

Missing a concert on your birthday? That could hurt, sure but what if you thought about it differently? What if you asked different questions? Assign different meaning?

…..maybe there are times that you can’t feel super happy, I understand. Maybe you won’t be jumping for joy but I bet that there are ways that you can find a different more empowering meaning. Try it, even just as an experiment.

Think about Victor Frankl’s book “Man’s Search For Meaning” – if you haven’t read it, please do.

I heard someone the other day say that not getting her child into a dance studio was ‘horrific’. I know this person well enough and luckily we have mutual respect that I was able to speak frankly. I pointed out that while it could be disappointing, using the word “horrific’ probably is just making it worse, plus it isn’t teaching your child the best things, in fact it is probably something worse that an alternative life lesson. I cited Frankl’s book and asked if he would think this situation was horrific. Luckily she recognized my point and found some humor in it and lightened up a bit. (I rarely speak up like this and I don’t pretend to know everything)

We all do it, just look for ways to make those “bad” moments better.

Avoid labeling things as good or bad. They’re just events. See what happens.

Avoid assigning meaning. Or if you must., assign something good “OK I got rejected from this one, I’m expecting something better to come along so the Universe/God/whatever is making me wait until that’s ready….” or something like that?

Thanks, take care….

http://www.onewebstrategy.com

Why the Inside Matters

A great post from Wayne Dyer’s blog

———–

Why the Inside Matters

5/15/13 at 9:00 am | 9 Comments   by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer http://www.drwaynedyer.com/blog/latest

I’m in the middle of what has become my annual Canada tour and it’s such a pleasure to feel all the love from my spiritual kinspeople here. I think of myself as “almost Canadian” since my parents were both born in Ontario, my father in Chatham in 1914 and my mother in Hamilton in 1916. I grew up in Detroit and Canada is part of my world. Last month I spoke at the Hay House I Can Do It Conference in Vancouver—wonderful and beautiful as always. And on June 29, I’ll be speaking at the Hay House I Can Do It Conference in Toronto. It’s the weekend before Canada Day on July 1 so maybe we’ll have some early fireworks to enjoy.

I have some great Canada stories, like the time I got lost in Vancouver’s Stanley Park and instead of my usual six miles ended up running a marathon before I found my way out! Lately, I’ve been sharing one of my favorite Toronto experiences with my audiences. It happened several years ago when an unsuspecting young man helped me illustrate an eternal truth we all need to be reminded of:

I was preparing to speak at an I Can Do It conference and I decided to bring an orange on stage with me as a prop for my lecture. I opened a conversation with a bright young fellow of about twelve who was sitting in the front row.

“If I were to squeeze this orange as hard as I could, what would come out?” I asked him.

He looked at me like I was a little crazy and said, “Juice, of course.”

“Do you think apple juice could come out of it?”

“No!” he laughed.

“What about grapefruit juice?”

“No!”

“What would come out of it?”

“Orange juice, of course.”

“Why? Why when you squeeze an orange does orange juice come out?”

He may have been getting a little exasperated with me at this point. “Well, it’s an orange and that’s what’s inside.”

I nodded. “Let’s assume that this orange isn’t an orange, but it’s you. And someone squeezes you, puts pressure on you, says something you don’t like, offends you. And out of you comes anger, hatred, bitterness, fear. Why? The answer, as our young friend has told us, is because that’s what’s inside.”

It’s one of the great lessons of life.  What comes out when life squeezes you?  When someone hurts or offends you? If anger, pain and fear come out of you, it’s because that’s what’s inside. It doesn’t matter who does the squeezing—your mother, your brother, your children, your boss, the government. If someone says something about you that you don’t like, what comes out of you is what’s inside. And what’s inside is up to you, it’s your choice.

When someone puts the pressure on you and out of you comes anything other than love, it’s because that’s what you’ve allowed to be inside. Once you take away all those negative things you don’t want in your life and replace them with love, you’ll find yourself living a highly functioning life.

Thanks, my young friend, and here’s an orange for you!

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