Frey Freyday-Celebration

Words To Live By: Celebration

 

(This is one of a part of a series of WORDS TO LIVE BY. This series grew out of a workbook I first made for my young daughters and discussed at the dinner table. These Words include values, good ideas, and Words to aspire to….and learn from….enjoy!)

(Photo – Jim Carrey, Ace Ventura, Warner Bros. 1994)

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I know right away some people may question why or what I mean by celebration and why it is a Word To Live By.

I think we all need to celebrate more often.

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Yes, I said we. As I’ve mentioned before, I am naturally a low-key guy. I think part of me tries to downplay things. I notice that especially with friends, with my sisters, and relatives – those with which I grew up – when something good happens or when I’m excited about something – I try to act cool, calm, and un-excited when I tell them about it.

The other day I was excited about a project at work. I was telling a relative and I noticed that right way, I downplayed the whole thing. It came off like I was actually down about it. He tried to give me some encouragement. I was actually excited. I needed and wanted to celebrate with him. We both would have enjoyed it and benefited, right?

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In any case, celebrating is something I believe to be a key issue in life, here’s why:

• We need to celebrate things each day, even the little things – we paid the bills, we have good health, we took some kind of action and had some kind of success, we did something good for someone else, etc.
• So many times we actually did something good, accomplished something, took action and we don’t take a moment to celebrate.
• Celebrating in the present moment allows us and helps us to focus on the now, what is going on – whether it be with our family, friends, work, or fun things.
• We can benefit greatly from celebrating future events – here’s what I mean – if you act as if what you want in life is already a reality, celebrating “IT” as already being reality brings in all kinds of good emotions, eliminates thoughts of conditions, limitations. Your brain doesn’t know that the difference between the imagination and reality of it all – so Celebration for something as if it has already happened is very powerful.

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Imagine that you already have “it” or that you’ve already accomplished “it” – then celebrate! Wayne Dyer says “Highly realized people learn to think from the end- that is, they experience what they wish to intend before it shows up in the material form.” Celebrate that car, that job, that improved relationship, that newly thinner, leaner body. Enjoy it.

I practice money coming in and I get the feeling like I’m winning the lottery. I hold my arms up like Rocky on the top of the Philly steps and I jump around. I visualize and celebrate. I enjoy it.

How would you react if you won the lottery? Got a perfect job? Had that perfect car/house/relationship/health? OK, now go ahead and practice celebrating it so that when it arrives, you’ll be ready. In the meantime, you’ll feel great.

I’ll be honest, I don’t know if it will always work, but EVERYTIME I feel really great afterwards! I’m smiling, happier, energized, and guess what? I’m now looking for good things to come, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Celebrate what you’ve accomplished in your life! Too many of us don’t give ourselves enough credit. Look into the past, briefly, get those good references and celebrate them. You endured hurdles and mistakes and you are now the person you are because you kept moving. Celebrate it!

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Celebrate the present – your family, friends, work, life, health – even if it isn’t perfect. Sure you can want to improve something but hell, if you didn’t have your situation now, you wouldn’t have the perspective, wisdom, and knowledge to make it better, right? Guess what, you can help yourself now, you can even help others, you have choices, that’s great, celebrate! Celebrate your health and life – would you prefer the alternative?

I know that there are some days when you don’t feel like celebrating. Use Tony Robbins’ method “What could I celebrate today? (then even if you can’t think of something ask:) If I could think of something to celebrate, what would it be?”

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“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” — Oprah Winfrey

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Celebrate the future as if it is already happened! Celebrate the person you want to be, the thing you want to have, the issue you want to resolve, the situation that you want to improve! Enjoy it! Feel the fun!

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Celebrate what you want to see more of. – Tom Peters (author of In Search of Excellence and other books)

Feeling happy/celebratory/abundant/whatever surpasses the money in your bank account, the report from the doctor, the whatever – and transcends what others may think of you. Genuinely feeling a certain way is possible when you detach yourself from the things you desire and then celebrating it.

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Dream on it. Let your mind take you to places you would like to go, and then think about it and plan it and celebrate the possibilities. And don’t listen to anyone who doesn’t know how to dream.
Liza Minnelli

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Don’t you think that you’re more attractive to others when you’re thinking celebrating rather than the “ho-hum” you? Wouldn’t your career be a little different if you approached it in a ‘celebrating-way’ rather that complaining, whining and doing the minimum as so many people do? (not you of course)

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Celebrating sends a message to others around you, even to the Universe (if you believe in such)

“Don’t forget to CELEBRATE!!! Anchor the experience of doing something truly extraordinary with an awesome celebration.”- Tony Robbins

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Celebrating brings smiles and laughter. It brings joy and happiness. Enough said.

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(Frey Freyday is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff..)

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Frey Freyday was actually born out of something I created called “Words To Live By” (WTLB). Going forward, I will now not only share the quotes, as you may be used to receiving, but also a related (WTLB). In 1999, when we had our first daughter, I was contemplating how I would raise my new beautiful child, and I was thinking about how I can best educate her and my other children about values, morals, and other key thoughts about life. School offers education. Religion offers some values and morals. Parents offer most of it, sometimes intentionally, sometimes accidentally.

So I created a (WTLB) book, like a dictionary, which lists things like honesty, love, persistence, etc. with a definition that I created, with my wife’s input. I then turned it into a workbook with one word per page and space below for notes. For years we would discuss with my two daughters and they would draw pictures and make notes in the blank space. I may share some of those images with you. As they got older, they were less inclined to draw and more open to quotes and references from adults, hence where Frey Freyday came from..

Frey Freyday-Smile

(Frey Freyday is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

A warm smile is the universal language of kindness.-William Arthur Ward

If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.-Andy Rooney

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.-Phyllis Diller

We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do.-Mother Teresa

Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.-Leo Buscaglia

The real man smiles in trouble, gathers strength from distress, and grows brave by reflection.-Thomas Paine

Smiling is definitely one of the best beauty remedies. If you have a good sense of humor and a good approach to life, that’s beautiful.-Rashida Jones

Colors are the smiles of nature.-Leigh Hunt

The happiness of life is made up of minute fractions – the little, soon forgotten charities of a kiss or a smile, a kind look or heartfelt compliment.-Samuel Taylor Coleridge

There’s nothing I value more than the closeness of friends and family, a smile as I pass someone on the street.-Willie Stargell

The Best Makeup Is Your Smile. By J. Johnson

Words to Live By:

Smile – \ˈsmī(-ə)l\ – A smile is a facial expression formed primarily by flexing the muscles at the sides of the mouth. Try to smile at any appropriate chance you get. Give a smile to a stranger, a friend, a loved one. Everyone looks better with a smile. The right smile, at the right time, wins friends and calms enemies. A recent study found that in obituaries people often, more than any other attribute, mentioned their loved one’s smile. Putting a smile on your face will boost your mood and increase your potential for long-term happiness.

A genuine smile also sends the message to others that we are likeable, trustworthy and dependable – the kind of person others want to do business with, engage in conversation, or build meaningful relationships with.

Smiling stimulates our brain’s reward mechanisms in a way that even chocolate, a well-regarded pleasure-inducer, cannot match. Smiling reduces stress that your body and mind feel, almost similar to getting good sleep, according to recent studies. Smiling helps to generate more positive emotions within you.

 

Bonus: Ted Talk -The hidden power of smiling

http://www.ted.com/talks/ron_gutman_the_hidden_power_of_smiling

(FYI-Frey Freyday was actually born out of something I created called “Words To Live By” (WTLB). Going forward, I will now not only share the quotes, as you may be used to receiving, but also a related (WTLB). In 1999, when we had our first daughter, I was contemplating how I would raise my new beautiful child, and I was thinking about how I can best educate her and my other children about values, morals, and other key thoughts about life. So I created (WTLB).)

 

Frey Freyday – Memories

(Frey Freyday is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff..)

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Memories are thoughts that arise. They’re not realities. Only when you believe that they are real, then they have the power over you. But when you realize it’s just another thought arising about the past, then you can have a spacious relationship with that thought. The thought no longer has you in its grip.-Eckhart Tolle

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The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.-Bill Cosby

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Take care of all your memories. For you cannot relive them.-Bob Dylan

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You shouldn’t wait for other people to make special things happen. You have to create your own memories.-Heidi Klum

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To reminisce with my old friends, a chance to share some memories, and play our songs again.-Ricky Nelson

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Memories are the key not to the past, but to the future.-Corrie Ten Boom

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Chocolate is the first luxury. It has so many things wrapped up in it: Deliciousness in the moment, childhood memories, and that grin-inducing feeling of getting a reward for being good.-Mariska Hargitay

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It’s great to reminisce about good memories of my past. It was enjoyable when it was today. So learning to enjoy today has two benefits: it gives me happiness right now, and it becomes a good memory later.-George Foreman

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Memories of my girls are pretty precious. – Jim Frey

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Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.-Steven Wright

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I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer’s disease where they slowly began to recover other people’s lost memories.-George Carlin

Make THE decision in the right state of mind

Here is a great video that can help anyone with a tough decision, a tough situation, facing a situation or challenge that brings fear.

We all have to go outside a comfort level, we need to handle things without fear.

Our story can empower us or limit us.

http://getrmt.com/v1.php

How Scarcity Trap Affects Our Thinking, Behavior; $, time

How Scarcity Trap Affects Our Thinking, Behavior

by SHANKAR VEDANTAM – anuary 02, 2014 5:18 AM

http://www.npr.org/2014/01/02/259082836/how-scarcity-mentaly-affects-our-thinking-behavior

Listen to the Story –

Morning Edition

A Harvard economist finds there are psychological connections between the bad financial planning of many poor people and the poor time management of busy professionals. In both cases, he finds the experience of scarcity causes biases in the mind that exacerbate problems.

Copyright © 2014 NPR. For personal, noncommercial use only. See Terms of Use. For other uses, prior permission required.

RENEE MONTAGNE, HOST:

Let’s hear now about a new book that explores a major source of stress. The book is called “Scarcity” and it’s a look at what happens to us when we’re pressured with too little time or too little money. The authors say “Scarcity” actually changes how we think. NPR’s social science correspondent Shankar Vedantam explains.

SHANKAR VEDANTAM, BYLINE: Each September the state of Massachusetts asks one thing from “Scarcity” author and Harvard economist, Sendhil Mullainathan, to renew his car inspection sticker and each year this recipient of the MacArthur Genius Award does the same thing. He’s really busy, so on each day leading up to the expiration of the sticker, he tells himself he’ll attend to it the next day.

SENDHIL MULLAINATHAN: One more day of delay, I mean, what’s the big deal?

VEDANTAM: Pretty soon, Mullainathan finds himself driving around Boston with an expired sticker.

MULLAINATHAN: The sticker is three months expired and now you’re doing all sorts of stuff, like you’re driving down the street, oh, look, there’s a cop. I better make a right turn so he doesn’t see my expired sticker.

VEDANTAM: Turning the wrong way makes Mullainathan late for a meeting or late for class. Now, he has to spend time fixing the mistake, rescheduling meetings with students, playing catch-up. His next day gets even busier. Now, he definitely doesn’t have time to fix that sticker.

MULLAINATHAN: I do this constantly. Right now, I’ve got a meeting to get to. I don’t have the time to replace the sticker. Whereas, the truth is, the enormous amount of distortions I’ve now made for the last three months because of the stupid sticker add up to five times as much time as I would’ve spent just going and having it fixed.

VEDANTAM: Mullainathan recently decided to think about his behavior like a researcher would. Was he just a busy absentminded professor or was there something else going on? He thought about research in his own field. He studies the economics of poverty. Lots of studies show poor people tend to make bad financial decisions, the kind that land them in ever deeper cycles of debt.

Mullainathan realized there was an unexpected connection between his behavior and the behavior of the people he studied.

MULLAINATHAN: Just as the poor mismanage their money, isn’t it astonishing how badly I mismanage my time?

VEDANTAM: Not having enough money and not having enough time, might not seem like similar things, but psychologically, they are similar. You’re running low on something you desperately need, you feel the pinch of scarcity. Mullainathan turned to a colleague of Princeton, the psychologist Eldar Shafir. That conversation lead to the book, “Scarcity,” which they wrote together.

Just as Mullainathan was asking why he mismanaged his own time, Shafir said he was asking why the poor make bad financial decisions.

ELDAR SHAFIR: Perhaps it’s the context of poverty itself, being in that context, that brings about a very special psychology, a psychology that’s particular to not having enough. And in that psychology brings out problematic outcomes.

VEDANTAM: After lots of research Mullainathan and Shafir have concluded that when you don’t have something you desperately need, the feeling of scarcity works like a trap. In a study looking at poor farmers in India, for example, the researchers found that farmers tended to be better planners and thinkers when they were flush with cash. But right before harvest, when they were strapped for cash, Mullainathan says their brains focused only on short term goals.

MULLAINATHAN: When you have scarcity and it creates a scarcity mindset, it leads you to take certain behaviors which in the short term help you manage scarcity, but in the long term only make matters worse.

VEDANTAM: Poor farmers, for example, tend to weed their fields less often than wealthy farmers. It’s the same with being super busy. The busier Mullainathan got, the harder it became for him to make time to get his car sticker. In fact, there was a short term reward for not getting the sticker. On each day he didn’t get the sticker renewed, he saved a little time to devote to other pressing demands.

But each delay made things worse the next day. Scarcity, whether of time or money, tends to focus the mind on immediate challenges. You stretch your budget to make ends meet. People in the grip of scarcity are tightly focused on meeting their urgent needs, but that focus comes at a price. Important things on the periphery get ignored.

MULLAINATHAN: That’s at the heart of the scarcity trap. You’re so focused on the urgent that the important gets waylaid. But because the important gets waylaid, you’re experiencing even more scarcity tomorrow.

VEDANTAM: Mullainathan and Shafir think we ought to change how we think about poverty and how we think about time. When poor people and busy people run short of money or time, we tend to blame them.

MULLAINATHAN: There’s this presumption in our entire social policies here that mistakes happen because of willful negligence and I think just understanding that, yes, we need incentives to prevent willful negligence, but we also need a way to recognize that no matter how hard somebody tries, there will be mistakes.

VEDANTAM: It might be possible to reduce the impact of mistakes caused by scarcity. The poor farmer in India might need repeated reminders about weeding. One might not be enough. The minimum wage worker in America might need a couple of extra days to pay her bills instead of being slapped with a fine one day after payment is due.

For busy people, Shafir says a respite from scarcity might mean penciling in a block of time in their calendar so long term things have a chance to bubble up.

SHAFIR: One of the few things I’ve learned from the book which I try to adhere to now is throughout my day, when I have a day that’s, you know, scheduled moment by moment throughout the day, fully packed, I try to arrange a couple of half hour chunks, half hour slots that are unplanned.

VEDANTAM: If you try to make an appointment with Shafir at that time, he’ll tell you he has a meeting. What he doesn’t tell you is that the meeting is with himself. Shankar Vedantam, NPR News.

Being rich is all about having the right habits

Being rich is all about having the right habits. That’s the message from Tom Corley, who spent five years observing how rich and poor people lived, worked, and even slept. Then, Corley wrote about his research in a book called “Rich Habits: The Daily Success Habits of Wealthy Individuals.”

Here’s what he found:

First: Be an early bird. Because among people making six-figures a year, about half wake up at least three hours before they have to be at work. Then, Corley says they use that extra morning time to focus on self-improvement like reading and exercising, because those things help them be more productive at work.
Another daily habit that can make you rich:Don’t gossip. According to Corley’s research, wealthy people are a whopping 14 times less likely to say they spread gossip, compared to people earning less than $30,000 a year.

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Also: Spend less time using the Internet. Corley says most people who struggle with money spend at least an hour a day surfing the Web, or watching TV. But rich people are HALF as likely to go online every day. Instead, they spend that extra hour connecting with others in the “real world,” doing things like networking, socializing, and volunteering.

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Another helpful habit: Make more “to-do” lists. Because wealthy people say they cross off 70% percent of the tasks on their to-do list every day – including short-term and long-term goals, meaning, rich people love getting stuff done.

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Finally: According to the book, wealthy people are calorie counters. They generally limit alcoholic consumption, keep their junk food snacks to less than 300 calories per day, and weigh less. And it makes sense that successful people would weight less, 75% of executives in a recent survey said that being overweight is a “serious career impediment.” Overweight people are 3,000 times more likely to get passed over for a promotion. And fair or not, overweight applicants get turned down for jobs more than any other group.

http://www.tesh.com

Simple Stuff

(Simple stuff is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

The world is moved along, not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of tiny pushes of each honest worker. –Helen Keller  <!–[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]–> <!–[endif]–>

My heroes are and were my parents. I can’t see having anyone else as my heroes. –Michael Jordan  <!–[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]–> <!–[endif]–>We’re our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves. –Tony Robbins

A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer. –Ralph Waldo Emerson

A hero is someone who understands the responsibility that comes with his freedom. –Bob Dylan

A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.-Christopher Reeve  <!–[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]–> <!–[endif]–>

Being a hero means being your real self, doing what you really want to do, going got ‘it’ whatever it is, not trying to appease others – Jim Frey

My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don’t really know what’s happening down there. Who is the real hero? –Mitch Hedberg

BONUS-

CNN revealed the 2013 Top 10 CNN Heroes — now it’s time to let them know which inspire you the most. Vote for the CNN Hero of the Year at http://CNNHeroes.com/ — once a day, EVERY DAY thru 11/17.

Feeling stressed, tense, worried?

You know, we’ve all been there in one way or another: we’ve been tense and focused on money, maybe stressed, maybe short with our spouse, maybe short with our kids….and in that moment when we’re stressing about money, we’re missing the world around us.

You know what I mean when I say “That awful feeling in the pit of your stomach because you feel like you have to worry about running out of money at the end of the month.”

I’ve been there, then back on “top”, then stressed again, a few times in my life.

I heard a funny thing the other day; someone was saying how they thought ‘rich people’ always think about money and ‘rich people’ are all shallow.

Maybe some are shallow, but in my experience and from what I read, when you had enough money to pay the bills and to live in a decent way, you’re NOT thinking about money much at all. When you have enough to cover the bills, you can think about fun things, about things that you WANT to do in your job and career, and things that you can do for or contribute to others – you can choose to enjoy life a little more.

When I was struggling with income and bills, and when I observe others that have the same struggle to pay bills and meet their obligations, they think about money all day long.

There is a great book that I highly recommend called “Bridges out of Poverty”. It helps explain how people struggling in poverty are constantly thinking about how they are paying the bills, food on the table, tires on the car, utility bills, etc.

Even if we aren’t at the poverty level, we can sometimes have some traits of the poverty mindset……we worry about money, about paying the mortgage, about our jobs, etc. This never creates a good feeling inside, does it?

Again, as someone that has been back and forth, here is some wisdom that I’ve learned from a few others and I believe that it really can help:

• Focus on what you want, not what you don’t want – instead of focusing on the bills and lack of cash, focus on the things that you really want, the freedom, peace of mind, better health, better relationships, enjoying life, security for your family, etc.

• Watch your self-talk- we all talk to ourselves and ask ourselves questions throughout the day. There is enough negativity in the world, don’t add to it by bringing yourself down. I was someone who beat myself up for many things and once in a while still do – if you do also, STOP. Reflect on accomplishments, look for references why you’re good at something, ask yourself questions like “Why do I deserve this?” and “Why am I so lucky?” instead of things like “Why can’t I earn more money” or ‘why is this such a struggle’ or ‘why don’t I ever win anything?”

• Have a vision – ok maybe your life isn’t where you want it to be now and you want to improve – almost everyone does….create a vision. It doesn’t have to be a major complicated thing – something as simple as some bullet points or a paragraph or two is fine – create a simple story of you as you want to be – make the story in present tense as if you already have it – as if you are already “THERE” and you’re looking back on today, when you are struggling. Make sure that in the story you talk about how you’re proud of the steps you took, the hard work, the good attitude, and how you changed for the better. Remember, tell the ideal story of your life as if it is already done!

• Enjoy the present, live in the moment – when we worry about the future or fret over the past, we miss moments and experiences right in front of us. I recall a time when my wife and I had time alone and I sat there worrrying about something that never even happened. Another time I recall worrying about something and basically ignoring my daughters when I had a free day with them. We all lost and nothing was gained. Take a moment to look around, be aware, and live today’s life. Things can happen in a moment. Look for miracles. You gotta celebrate life’s moments no matter what. There is no rehearsal.

• Here’s something that can be the toughest for any of us – do the above each and everyday. We can all do things for a while or on occasion, or here and there. We have to ask the right questions, focus on the good stuff, reflect on our vision, and enjoy the present every day! We all must take action – even if they are just baby steps each day. Ask, ‘what thing, regardless how big or small, can I do today?” You don’t have to spend long on it – but at least 5 -10 minutes. Can you turn off the TV, put down the phone, or walk away from the computer or ipad for 10 minutes if it makes you better?

Remember, people with much less smarts, ability, education, opportunity have done great things, contributed, made money, helped others, and been successful , you have the ability, you have the power inside, you just need to take action.

http://www.onewebstrategy.com

😉

Simple Stuff- Celebration

(Simple Stuff  is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

Celebrate what you want to see more of. -Tom Peters

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The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. -Oprah Winfrey

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You’ve to celebrate the good days because there are brutal days that make the good ones sweet. -Brian O’Driscoll

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Life has meaning only in the struggle. Triumph or defeat is in the hands of the Gods. So let us celebrate the struggle! -Stevie Wonder

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Dream on it. Let your mind take you to places you would like to go, and then think about it and plan it and celebrate the possibilities. And don’t listen to anyone who doesn’t know how to dream. – Liza Minnelli

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“Don’t forget to CELEBRATE!!! Anchor the experience of doing something truly extraordinary with an awesome celebration.”- Tony Robbins

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I think we all need to celebrate more often. – Jim Frey

(more at http://wp.me/p2mGFu-3F )

Simple Stuff – Enthusiasm

(Simple Stuff  is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

I  play to win, whether during practice or a real game. And I will not let anything  get in the way of me and my competitive enthusiasm to win.
Michael  Jordan

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Enthusiasm  is the mother of effort, and without it nothing great was ever  achieved.-Ralph  Waldo Emerson

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Indeed,  there is an eloquence in true enthusiasm that is not to be  doubted. -Edgar  Allan Poe

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“First of all, I want to make one thing clear: The quality of your life is the quality of where you live emotionally,” “But we all have a home. Angry people find a way to get angry even if their life doesn’t have anything to be angry about. We can always find it. Sad people find a way to be sad. Caring people find a way to care for other people. Enthusiastic people are enthusiastic – and fun to be around!…..So one thing to identify is where are you living? What’s your home? What’s your habit? And then the way to change it.” – Tony Robbins

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I  prefer the folly of enthusiasm to the indifference of  wisdom. -Anatole  France

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Winners  must learn to relish change with the same enthusiasm and energy that we have  resisted it in the past. -Tom Peters

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A man can succeed at almost anything for which he has unlimited enthusiasm. -Charles Schwab

www.onewebstrategy.com