Frey Freyday – Label

(Frey Freyday is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

Label [ˈlābəl] –VERB –labeling (present participle) assign to a category, especially inaccurately or restrictively.

Do you want to know who you are? Don’t ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you. –Thomas Jefferson

Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition or label of your life; define yourself. –Harvey Fierstein

Once you label me you negate me. –Soren Kierkegaard

If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome. –Michael Jordan

I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine. –Bruce Lee

Never idealize others. They will never live up to your expectations. –Leo Buscaglia

If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. –Abraham Maslow

Winners make a habit of manufacturing their own positive expectations in advance of the event. –Brian Tracy

Expectations are a form of first-class truth: If people believe it, it’s true.-Bill Gates

You can’t base your life on other people’s expectations. –Stevie Wonder

If you were to look up your name in the dictionary, how would you be defined? Would three words just about cover it, or would your epic narrative consume page after page—or even demand a volume of its own? – Tony Robbins

I think any label is bad. I’m more than a label. – Unknown

  –

WORD TO LIVE BY:

Labels – something we assign to a person, situation, experience or event. Typically we assign the meaning to these things and depending on our perspective, the label can vary greatly.

As we approach a new year, we often reflect on days and years gone by, and those ahead of us. We all tend to label some days or years as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. We label simple and complex events each and every day as good or bad.

Yet, did you ever label something as ‘bad’ and with time and perspective, you look back and it wasn’t that bad. In fact, sometimes aren’t those events actually good for our lives? There is a Zen story about this, I shared it below in the bonus section. Perspective and timing do change the meaning. We assign the meaning. We can often benefit from not labeling…..

We label people in our lives, even those we don’t really know. How many times have we labeled someone one way and only to find out that they do not fall under that label?

When we place expectations on others or in a relationship, in essence we are putting a label on the person, relationship, or situation. This is inaccurate and limits the person, situation or relationship.

We label ourselves, consciously and unconsciously. Typically I find that we are all hard on ourselves, too hard. Our self-talk is critical and we need to reinforce the good, learn from mistakes and failures and keep an open mind about people, events, and situations before we simply label them as good or bad.

When we put labels on things, you’ve got twoness. You’ve got the label, and you’ve got what you’re labeling. And there is only oneness in the universe, even though we artificially believe in twoness. Our ego likes the feeling of control with a label, it likes the feeling that we know what we’re doing. Really there is no control.

Ideas:

  • When something happens, don’t label it good or bad. It is just an event. Be in the moment, observe, be self-aware, learn from it and move on
  • When you catch yourself labeling something or someone, don’t judge yourself either. Just stop, realize it, and move on
  • Spend a day without the label of “parent” or “boss” and put yourself into an open, observant, self-aware state of mind.

 

Frey Freyday was actually born out of something I created called “Words To Live By” (WTLB). Going forward, I will now not only share the quotes, as you may be used to receiving, but also a related (WTLB). In 1999, when we had our first daughter, I was contemplating how I would raise my new beautiful child, and I was thinking about how I can best educate her and my other children about values, morals, and other key thoughts about life. School offers education. Religion offers some values and morals. Parents offer most of it, sometimes intentionally, sometimes accidentally.

So I created a (WTLB) book, like a dictionary, which lists things like honesty, love, persistence, etc. with a definition that I created, with my wife’s input. I then turned it into a workbook with one word per page and space below for notes. For years we would discuss with my two daughters and they would draw pictures and make notes in the blank space. I may share some of those images with you. As they got older, they were less inclined to draw and more open to quotes and references from adults, hence where Frey Freyday came from….

You can read more at www.onewebstrategy.com

BONUS  :   THE ZEN STORY – GOOD LUCK? BAD LUCK? WHO KNOWS! 

An elderly, hard-working Chinese farmer and his son, had a single horse. They used the horse to plow the field, to sow the seeds, grow the crop, and transport it to the market. The horse was essential for the farmer to earn his livelihood.

One morning, the horse broke the fence and ran away into the woods. When the neighbors found out that the only horse the farmer had, had run away, they came to solace him. They said – “Your only horse has run away just before the planting season. How will you till the land? How will you sow the seeds? This is unfortunate. This is bad luck.”

The farmer replied – “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?”

A few days later the farmer’s horse returned from the woods along with two other wild horses. When the neighbors found out the news, they said – ” Now you have three horses! You can till the land much faster with three horses. Maybe you can buy more land and sow more crop and make more money. Or you can sell the other two horses. Either way, you will be a rich man! This is good luck! “

The wise farmer replied – “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?”

Next morning, the farmer’s son started training the wild horses to that they would help till the land. While attempting to mount one of the wild horses, he fell down and broke his leg. Just before the sowing season, the son would not be able to help the farmer with his broken leg. The neighbors came once again and commented – ” This is really unfortunate. This is bad luck.

The wise farmer repeated – “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?”

A few days later, the king’s men started to visit each village in the kingdom. A war had started between their kingdom and a neighboring enemy state. The king’s men were enlisting the eldest son from each family to join the army so that they could defeat the enemy state. When they came to the farmer’s house they saw the son with the broken leg. He would not be of much use in the army and hence they didn’t take him. He was the only eldest son in the entire village who was not forcibly taken by the king’s men to fight the war. The neighbors, some of them with teary eyes, came once again to the farmer and commented – “Your son breaking his leg was really fortunate. He is the only one who was not taken. What a stroke of good luck.

The farmer calmly replied – “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?”

Every single time the neighbors thought that what had happened to the farmer was bad luck, it turned out to be good luck! And just when the neighbor’s thought that the incidents had brought the farmer good luck, it turned out to be bad luck! 

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