Frey Freyday – Needs

(Frey Freyday is simply a bunch of inspirational, motivational and other quotes meant to make you think, reflect, smile, even laugh a bit. Hopefully helpful, useful stuff….)

NEEDS – [needz] a lack of something wanted or deemed necessary

A friend is what the heart needs all the time. Henry Van Dyke

A home with a loving and loyal husband and wife is the supreme setting in which children can be reared in love and righteousness and in which the spiritual and physical needs of children can be met. David A. Bednar

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul. John Muir

Communication is a continual balancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacy and independence. To survive in the world, we have to act in concert with others, but to survive as ourselves, rather than simply as cogs in a wheel, we have to act alone. Deborah Tannen

Encouragement to others is something everyone can give. Somebody needs what you have to give. It may not be your money; it may be your time. It may be your listening ear. It may be your arms to encourage. It may be your smile to uplift. Who knows? Joel Osteen

Each person holds so much power within themselves that needs to be let out. Sometimes they just need a little nudge, a little direction, a little support, a little coaching, and the greatest things can happen. Pete Carroll

What a person needs to change is to change his awareness of himself. Abraham Maslow


Needs – something we must fill or meet to grow

Abraham Harold Maslow was an American psychologist who was best known for creating Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. This was such a great insight for humanity. Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, simply put, states that people are motivated to achieve certain needs, and that some needs take precedence over others. When one need is fulfilled a person seeks to fulfill the next one, and so on.


It is basically a five stage hierarchy and it can be divided into basic (deficiency) needs (including physiological, safety) and growth needs (such as love, esteem). These all relate to fulfilling our human potential which Maslow referred to as self-actualization.

Basic needs motivate people when they are not met. Also, people need to fulfill such needs and the need will become stronger the longer the duration they are denied. This is easy to understand if you consider a hunger person; the longer a person goes without food the more hungry they will become.

People must satisfy  these lower level needs before progressing on to meet higher level growth needs. When a basic need has been satisfied it will go away. Growth needs, on the other hand, remain and may even become stronger once they have been felt. If these growth needs have been reasonably satisfied, one may be able to reach the highest level called self-actualization.It has been stated that every person is capable and has the desire to move up the hierarchy of needs towards self-actualization.

Progress is often disrupted by failure to meet lower level needs – it is difficult to be creative, be accomplished, have strong relationships if you’re starving or if you don’t have security and safety. Death of a loved one, divorce, loss of job and other life experiences may cause an individual to fluctuate between levels of the hierarchy.

Most of us here in the U.S. have our basic needs met – food, water, warmth, rest, safety, security. Do you think we meet many of the others?

Probably because our basic needs are met, there are others that have a similar, yet shorter breakdown of needs; for instance Tony Robbins discusses Six Human Needs:

  1. Certainty/Comfort. We all want comfort. And much of this comfort comes from certainty. Of course there is no absolute certainty, but we want certainty the car will start, the water will flow from the tap when we turn it on and the currency we use will hold its value.
  2. Variety. At the same time we want certainty, we also crave variety. Paradoxically, there needs to be enough UNcertainty to provide spice and adventure in our lives.
  3. Significance. Deep down, we all want to be important. We want our life to have meaning and significance.
  4. Connection/Love. We all have some form of the need for love. We want to feel part of a community. We want to be cared for and cared about.
  5. Growth. There could be some people who say they don’t want to grow, but I think they’re simply fearful of doing so—or perhaps not doing so – or making a mistake. Growth means to become better, to improve our skills, to stretch and to excel.
  6. Contribution. The desire to contribute something of value—to help others, to make the world a better place than we found it.

Regardless which process, list or philosophy you prefer, Are you meeting all of your needs? Are you meeting the needs of your children? Of your spouse?

What one thing can you do to address a need for someone else? For yourself?

Frey Freyday was actually born out of something I created called “Words To Live By” (WTLB). Going forward, I will now not only share the quotes, as you may be used to receiving, but also a related (WTLB). In 1999, when we had our first daughter, I was contemplating how I would raise my new beautiful child, and I was thinking about how I can best educate her and my other children about values, morals, and other key thoughts about life. School offers education. Religion offers some values and morals. Parents offer most of it, sometimes intentionally, sometimes accidentally.

So I created a (WTLB) book, like a dictionary, which lists things like honesty, love, persistence, etc. with a definition that I created, with my wife’s input. I then turned it into a workbook with one word per page and space below for notes. For years we would discuss with my two daughters and they would draw pictures and make notes in the blank space. I may share some of those images with you. As they got older, they were less inclined to draw and more open to quotes and references from adults, hence where Frey Freyday came from….


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