How do you change somebody – without them knowing it?‏

VERY INTERESTING, CHECK IT OUT. (not an affiliate link, just good info)

Can you create change in somebody… without them knowing about it?

Of course you can!

You see, when you’re in a relationship with somebody, you’re in an interactive pattern with them. When you change what you’re doing, the other person has no choice but to change. If nothing is changing in your relationship, it means you’re not changing the right things.

This isn’t just about romantic relationships – it applies to relationships with family, kids, bosses, employees, friends, colleagues, business partners, you name it.

This is the thing: many of the patterns in any relationship in your life are set by YOU, not just the other person. You are actually doing things to keep that interactive pattern in place. So the way to change what they’re doing… is to change how you’re interacting with them.

As Strategic Interventionists, this is the kind of work we LOVE doing! When someone comes to us complaining about someone in their life, we use a strategy for understanding the interactive pattern. And it becomes very clear what our client needs to do. We use one of our strategies for creating interactive change – and the results speak for themselves.

Here’s an example. Tony Robbins is giving a live seminar when a young woman stands up to share her relationship challenge. We learn she has a young baby and is living apart from the father. She feels helpless to change things, and she cries. Watch how Tony quickly figures out the interactive dynamic and gets her to shift things from her end.

I probably use this strategy once a week – just in helping people in their work relationships!

Check it out

Mark Peysha
CEO and Cofounder
Robbins-Madanes Training

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